Will you marry me?

So apparently if YOUR game piece lands on the same space as SOMEONE ELSE's game piece, you're going to get married - at least if you're 5.

Who knew how easy it was to find a life partner?

Time for a walk

There is a kindergarten girl who loves to pretend she is a dog - so much so that she spends all her time at recess with me, telling me stories of the dog (today she was a German Shepherd named Hans) and asking me to throw balls for her to fetch.  I was a little concerned about her lack of social interaction and connection with her peers -  until today when I saw a class mate "walking" her. Really. It was a good thing :)

Hey!

There seems to be a direct correlation between a child's annoyance with another child and the number of syllables they add to "Hey!" (often, but not always followed by "that's not fair")

Today I heard an impressive 4 syllable "heyeyeyeye".

It's all how you look at it

Talking about Halloween tomorrow, a 4th grade girl told me "I'm going to be a pink rabbit, but I'm telling people I'm really a blue rabbit that fell into pink paint"

Guessing the store was out of blue rabbit costumes :)

A complaint by any other name...

Our school houses one of the district's Elementary Advanced Programs - for "gifted" kids.  They are on the playground at the same time as all other classes in their grade level.  Mostly, they are doing what all the kids are doing and I don't always  know what class any particular student is in. I DID figure one out today though, when he gave me a laundry list of complaints about a certain game and ended the list with "and so forth and so on".

 Perhaps I should have said "a well spoken laundry list of complaints".

Hey Baby....

" Hey - want to help me find a rainbow?"

If it hadn't been said sweetly from one Kindergartner to another, it could easily have been a cheesy pick up line.

Me and Hil

Fairly certain the skills learned brokering peace deals on the tether ball court qualifies me for some sort of State Department appointment.

So sweet?

So sweet! I thought as I watched a 3rd grader stop and hug her 6th grade brother. Then I heard her say to her friend as they walked away: "haha - he hates when I do that"

OK maybe not sweet, but oh so normal!

Tag...

Saddest complaint of the day:

Danny keeps running from me - and we're not even playing tag.

High five!

Sometimes, I'm at a loss for the right thing to say in a given situation. Today a 6th grade boy came up to me:

"Mrs Y - look! I have hair on my face!"  Thankfully, a simple high five did the trick.

Wingman: A Wingman is a guy you bring along with you on singles outings that helps you out with the women.

Overheard two 2nd grade boys:

1-"The new girl wants to kiss me"
2- "Want me to beat her up?"

I think boy #1 may want to find a new wingman...

It's all Walmart's fault

Sometimes 6th graders' thinking and insight impresses me and takes me by surprise. Then they keep talking.

6th grade boy: "I think I know how the world will end. We are going to run out of natural resources - like gasoline"

Me: "Tell me more..."

Boy: "When we run out of gas, people won't be able to get to Walmart. Then they'll get angry and
kill everyone."

Maybe that was my fault for "tell me more".

Just One Look

I'm not bragging or anything but I'm pretty sure I've perfected one"look" that says several things:

*Stop running in the hall
*Yep - I saw that
*That's a warning
*Don't even think about it
*Put the stick/rock/sand down
*Did you really just say that?
*You DO know I know your mother, right?

Just to mention a few :)

he said, she said, no I didn't, yes you did.

I spent a good 15 minutes (that's 1/2 of recess) helping to problem solve an issue with a group of 3rd graders. I led them as they accused, denied, bargained, negotiated, gave in, cried, apologized, acquiesced, and came up with new options.  In the end, they all left satisfied.  I don't know about them, but I was exhausted. As I walked away I knew it was worth the effort when I heard one boy say to another "that was a lot easier than I thought".

It did make me wonder though - what in the world was he expecting?

Fun?

I noticed a group of kids going down our big, green, plastic slide this afternoon - yelling "ow -ow-ow" the whole way.  When they finished, they'd giggle and climb the stairs to do it again.  Finally I had to ask what they were doing. "Getting shocked!" I was told. And they went to do it yet again.  I struggled to make sense of this seemingly odd behavior but felt better when I rationalized they were just excited to learn about static electricity. Guess who's bringing in balloons for them to rub on their hair tomorrow :)


"Mrs Y - there's a girl stuck on the fence" should have been my clue that today was going to be an interesting day.

I know where it's at

Yep - got some points today when I told a kindergartner his batman water bottle was awesome.
 "You know who batman is??!"  
Even more points when I told him I saw the movie. 
If only every day was so easy :)
Woo hoo - back to school!

When the sun comes out.

At the beginning of recess I had a 6th grade girl complaining about the (too modest) school dress code and at the end of recess I had a first grader tell me he found a skirt at the far end of the playground.  Not saying the two are connected, but...

Guess who's coming to recess

I never know who will show up at recess - today a group (flock? gaggle? herd? swarm?) of Greek gods and goddesses




Peace, not war

A first grade boy and girl came to me complaining that others were saying that the two of them were "at war" and they wanted to assure me they were not (any longer).  A crowd had gathered as we were talking and I took the opportunity to talk about the value of peace vs war.  The kids left chanting "peace not war - peace not war".  I sometimes wonder what the classroom teachers think happens out on the playground.

Did she really just ask that?

Don't you just wonder sometimes what exactly goes through their head??


4th grade boy: "Mrs Y - Can I get a bag?  I just pulled my tooth out."
Girl sitting next  to him - "Was it loose?"

3 ring circus

Some 4th grade girls wanted to put on a "circus" on the playground today and invited me to watch.  After they proceeded to give me a pretend ticket, one of them (quite sternly, I might add) told me "don't lose it".  For one second, I worried that I might.

Running between the rain drops

Because of the rain, I told the kids on the playground they needed to stay in a covered area if they didn't have a coat on.  After telling me he wouldn't get wet - and me still saying he couldn't be out on the field without a coat, one 1st grader clearly thought he had a deal for me when he asked "what if I promise to run really fast?"

About face

I thought this was an interesting way to explain the situation!


Friend :"Mrs. Y - come quick (to the soccer field),  Charlie's hurt."
Me: "What happened??"
Friend: "Someone was shooting on goal and his face got in the way"


Those things not included in the 4th grade curriculum

From a 4th grade boy:
You know what I've learned this year?  Never let girls take your shoes."


Well, there's that...

Wanna see?

So glad they feel comfortable and want to share with me, but really?
"Mrs. Y, his cut has pus coming out of it - wanna see?"


One more time that having 3 boys of my own helps on the job.
PS - I did go see, armed with a band aid. 



What a difference a day makes.

Yesterday, a girl fell and cut her head - requiring stitches, Today, another girl came to me and asked for a band aid.  When I asked her what happened I had to smile as she informed me "I broke a nail playing tether ball".


What a difference a day makes. 

Depends who you ask

Same incident - 3 stories:


From the boys "Mrs Y - the girls are torturing Arthur!"


From the girls "Mrs Y - Arthur won't let us pet him"


From Arthur (in response to  "Hey bud, what's going on?")
                       "I have no idea"

Time

A first grade boy, who has never complained at recess before came up to me quite upset: "Alex keeps changing the time machine in our game".  Thinking I had a perfectly reasonable question, I asked "what would happen if you just refused to go to the new time?" The look on his face when he responded " I could NEVER do that!" told me I crossed some sort of 7 year old boy line.


Oops.

Just wait!

From a couple of first grade boys:


Mrs Y - Girls are so confusing!  They ask us to chase them then get mad at us when we do! What should we do?


Rather than say what I really wanted to say ("Oh honey - just wait) I put on my grown up hat and instead said "I'm so glad you stopped when they asked you to.  Why don't you go play soccer?"


Hopefully they'll think about those words 10 years from now.

New member of the Rat Pack?

I passed the line of Kindergartners going to lunch and casually said "have a good lunch!"  One little guy responded with "you have a better one". 


Pretty sure if he knew  to wink and point at me he would have.  Might even have called me "doll".

Nah nah nah nah boo boo

 Apparently "Nah nah nah nah boo boo" is still the thing to say when you want someone to chase you on the playground.  The more things change, the more they stay the same. 


What does it even mean? And how in the world did that get started?!

Splash

Due to a huge puddle at the bottom, I closed the use of a slide on the playground. One little guy, thinking he was being very persuasive said "what if I promise NOT  to go in head first?"


Haha - was that his original plan??  I have to keep my eye on that one!

Meat and potatoes

From a5th grade boy:
:Mrs Y - what's that thing called where friends get together and make fun of another friend?  A steak?"  


Took me a minute to figure out what he was getting at. "  "A roast,, you mean?"  


"Haha. Yea.  That's it."

Wake up!

"Numbers make me tired" - 5th grade math student


How many times have we all thought THAT???

Things they don't teach you...

Two first grade girls came up to me on their hippity hops announcing their plan to bounce around the entire play field every day because they  want to be fashion models.  "That's fantastic"  I told them "you will be really healthy!"  Their reply took be aback: "We don't want to be healthy.  We want to be skinny". I took a deep breath (more like several) before I went on.  "Well you will have great muscles and endurance.  Good for you!"  They hopped off, I'm sure  thinking I totally missed the point.  That's OK though.  I didn't miss the point at all - just tried to change the direction of it.

That's what friends are for

5th grade boy: "Who was that president that ended with NIXON?"
Friend: "President Nixon?"
First boy "Yea! That's it!"

That's what friends are for!

Literally

"Mrs Y I think Jessica's hurt.  She's crying really hard."  I found Jessica and she was indeed crying really hard - that kind  of crying that makes it hard to speak.  Trying to assess what was wrong, I asked her why she was crying and had to strain to understand her as she sputtered out "My friend said something I hate". Assuming  she had heard something like " You're  not my friend" or "I don't like you" I said "Oh my goodness it looks like she really hurt your feelings.  What did she say?" I'm certain I didn't hide my surprise (or probably my smirk) when her answer was "smoked salmon" because she went on to explain, between sobs, "I hate sea food".


Really???

Allergies

One of our 4th grade girls walked into class holding an ice pack to her eye.  When I asked what happened she explained she has allergies. I asked what she was allergic to and she responded "pollen .... and  (giggling and not missing a beat) BOYS!"

Pretty sure antihistamine can help with the first.  The second, however, will just take time!

Ground Hog's Day?


The sun was out for the first time in weeks and a little girl ran out to recess, spread her arms out and shouted "I can see my shadow!"


Who needs Puxatony  Phil??

BxH/2

We were going over the 4th graders' homework which had to do with finding the area of a triangle.  One boy got all the problems wrong and realized though he had multiplied base times height, he forgot to divide by 2 - not an uncommon mistake.  We moved on, had the rest of the class and I thought all was well until I heard him say to his friend as  they were leaving : "triangles are stupid".

I just hope years from now he remembers the origin of his strong aversion to all things 3 sided!

Real Housewives

Two fourth grade girls end an argument with one huffing off and the other calling after her "  you know - honest women never have to hide".


Makes me wonder if that second girls' future is that of a screen writer? An author?  A Real Housewife of _______?

Oops

Mediating a kindergarten dispute today:
Boy#1 - He told me to shut up
Boy#2 - I did not!  OK - yes I did, but it doesn't count because I didn't mean to.  It just fell out of my mouth.


Oh, if only the things that fall our of our mouths didn't count!

Lady Gaga

When choosing a name, I bet Lady Gaga didn't think about the fact that her name would make a perfect elementary school playground insult.  Apparently it does.